Cabin fever

Is spring finally on it's way? Today the temperature got up to somewhere around 50 degrees, and I heard it's supposed to hit 60 on Wednesday. I hope this is truly the beginning of the end of winter. I'm itching to get out of the apartment, to be able to go to the playground or walk to the library or to just wander downtown. I don't know if I'm kidding myself that warm weather will make all that possible. Well, okay--possible, yes. But likely? Or enjoyable? I don't know. Amelia, Abigail, and Gabriel have gotten to the stage where being strapped into anything is just about the end of the world. Once they are buckled and moving they usually manage all right, but peace is usually tenuous and fairly brief. I am definitely struggling with feeling tied at home because it's just so hard to go anywhere. Some of my friends from MOPS went to the aquarium in Norwalk, CT last week for an outing and it was so frustrating to feel like I couldn't go because how am I supposed to contain three toddlers in a big public place like that and enjoy myself and allow other people to enjoy themselves in the process? I can handle a playdate at church or some other contained and familiar environment, or the playground where people expect kids to run wild and crazy, but I'm still not brave enough for much of anything more ambitious than that. Not on my own.

Garrett and I even agonize over what to do with the kids on the weekends when he is around to help. Today we made our second trip to the local Burger King. The picture is Gabriel making himself comfortable at one of the video game consoles they have. Seems to be one step up from McDonalds because it's cleaner (well, the first time it was) and not as busy. And the kid play area is completely contained, so they're not able to disturb everyone in the main area of the restaurant. That's all well and good, but I am anxious to start frequenting venues that don't involve fast food and sticky seats. I am hopeful that this upswing in temperatures really lasts and I can at least start getting outside on a regular basis, even if it's just for a brief walk and a breath of fresh air.

It's ironic to me that I am feeling especially cooped up these days, since the past few weeks I have had more interaction with the outside world than most since we have been working with our speech therapists, which means even if we don't leave the house we at least have something planned four days a week. Or maybe the reason I'm feeling so cooped up is that I've been reminded of what it's like to interact with people from beyond the walls of my home and I like it. I wondered if the four-day-a-week therapy schedule would feel overwhelming or too busy, but so far it's been great. I like having something to wake up for, having a reason (besides personal satisfaction) to take a shower every morning, having something "productive" happen during the day. I think when the weather is consistently inviting it will be more tempting to have a little more flexibility in the schedule, but as it is, with no car and mostly dreary weather, having someone knock on the door almost every day of the week is a treat.

And an extra bonus: the kids are responding! No one is quite speaking in full sentences yet--they say not to expect that until at least the third week--but all three little guys are more vocal these days, trying out new sounds. Abigail is learning to say "yes." And they are all using more gestures to communicate as well, including nodding, head shaking, waving, and signing the words "more" and "hungry." They don't all get it to equal degrees, but I am greatly encouraged to see changes happening. The therapy sessions are fun and upbeat and the kids clearly love them. Gabriel, always the socialite, has been happy to work with Sharon one on one a couple times so she's been able to get some concentrated time with him without the girls distracting him. Abigail is more hesitant to spend any time alone with Sharon, but in her last session on Wednesday she did get a few moments while I came and went with the other two. We are all trying to be flexible to see how it will best work to give the therapists one on one time so they can make the most of their time, but also be realistic about keeping the other two kids away and also trying to allow me to be involved in each session. We are working out kinks, but so far so good. Amelia really likes Carolyn, which is great. I'm a little surprised that she actually seems to verbally clam up a little when she is around, but it's clearly not because she is uncomfortable. She smiles a lot when Carolyn is around and loves to play with her, so I hope it is just that she is still adjusting to the concentrated nature of the play and that she will loosen up soon. I am still encouraged that Amelia is making good progress, since she is experimenting and opening up along with the others during non-therapy time. She loves to wave hello now, which is lots of fun. Today at BK she was playing in the tunnels and waving at me through the plexiglass with her big bright toothy grin. Priceless.